If you have been a follower of my blog for a length of time, you may have noticed I have mother issues. It may sound disrespectful but the day she walked out on our family she did us all a favor. Some years later my father remarried a wonderful woman who adopted his children and loves us all unconditionally. As for my birth mother, I tried for years to be part of her life; nevertheless, it had to be on her terms. I could not lower myself to those terms so I broke the connection just over 16 years ago. I did feel guilty for a few years; however, while I was fighting thyroid disease, she sent me a message hoping I would meet my demise. I no longer feel guilty.
Saturday, June 7, 2014; (Unconscious dreaming)
In this dream my father and I were living in the same home. I was awakened in my bed by the opening of my bedroom door. It was morning, and I looked over to see who was coming into my room. My birth mother whom I had not seen in years came in. With her were two of my granddaughters, five and seven. In reality, my birth mother has never known these two.
“What are you doing here? And what are you doing with my granddaughters?” I asked.
“I picked them up to spend sometime with them and thought I would drop by,” she answered.
She approached my bed and told the girls to get over in the bed on my right side. My birth mother then, staying dressed, got in the bed to my left.
“What are you doing?” I raised my voice in protest.
“We have been on the road all night and need a nap,” she said.
“Not in my bed, especially when I’m still in it.”
“Well it’s the only one available other than in your father’s room, and I’m not sleeping with him.”
I threw off the blankets and climbed out from the foot of the bed. I was in my underwear and quickly pulled on my clothes.
“If you and the girls need a nap fine but not with me. You shouldn’t even be here. This is my father’s home and when he finds out you’re here; he’s going to explode,” I informed her.
“Well you and your father are going to have to get used to it because I’m moving in,” she told me.
I laughed. “He’s going to toss you out as soon as he finds you’re here.”
“No he’s not. I’m here to help take care of him. You can’t do it alone.”
“Take care of him? There’s nothing wrong with my father. No one needs to take care of him,” I said.
“Your father is demented. You can’t expect to take care of him yourself.”
I grew angry at her accusations and stormed out of my room. I went in search of my father. He and my birth mother, his ex, did not get along. My father, a calm and laid-back gentleman would pop a gasket once he found out my birth mother was not only here but planning on moving in. I heard him in his room and, getting to the door, I could tell he was arguing with someone.
I stepped inside to find him dressed and an open suit case on his bed. He had the phone tucked between his neck and shoulder while he was packing.
“You people are idiots!” he yelled at whoever was on the other end. He took the phone and began dialing. I was taken back because my father does not talk to people like that. His demeanor here was short-tempered and sarcastic.
“Dad, what’s going on?” I asked.
“I’m trying to go on a trip but everyone I talk to from airlines to bus stations refuses to sell me a ticket.” He continued packing with one hand while dialing another number.
“Where are you trying to go?” I asked.
“Mars. I’m taking a trip to Mars,” he informed me. The thought of most people would be he had meant the planet; however, I knew my father.
“Oh, you’re going to Mars, Pennsylvania?”
He briefly stopped his packing and gave me a look that was both irritated at the question and fed up with whatever answer he was about to give.
“No! Don’t be so stupid. I’m going to Mars, the planet.”
I let out a small chuckle only to get an icy cold stare from him.
About that time someone on the other end of the phone must have answered.
“Yes, I’m in need of a round trip ticket to Mars.”
The person on the other end obviously asked what everyone else thought. My fathers face turned red.
“No!” he screamed into the phone, “Do these places hire nothing but idiots?” and threw the phone onto the bed. He reached over to his nightstand and pulled off a phone book. As he began flipping through the pages, I took the time to slip out the room.
I went back down the hall to my room. When I stepped in, my granddaughters were asleep. My mother was standing and in the process of undressing.
“Look,” I said, “this is crazy. You’re not staying here and don’t undress in my room.”
“This is our room now,” she spoke, “you’re going to have to share it with me.”
“My father and I aren’t sharing anything with you. Get dressed and get out of the house,” I demanded.
I stepped back into the hallway, slamming the door closed which awoke me.
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